Teenagers
I've taught teenagers for over 15 years, so I'm familiar with their behaviors. Even so, I had high hopes for the teens and pre-teens growing up under my roof.
My pre-teen is currently celebrating hitting puberty by dancing around the house because his skin is breaking out, his legs are getting hairy, and he's "becoming a man." Meanwhile, the new driver in the house is annoyed with me all the time and can't believe how stupid and unreasonable I am. But what is most interesting is when these two older boys clash. Most of the time they're content playing basketball together outside. But when they can't be physical with one another, their mouths begin to fly.
Yesterday the older and "wiser" teen instructed the younger preteen to shut up because he didn't know what he was talking about. Lucky for them, I was also in the room, and realized that neither knew what they were talking about. In that moment, I could have given them both a tongue lashing and put them in their place. Instead I asked this question, "Do your words honor God?"
All was quiet. The advice the elder was doling out was obviously not godly advice. It set a bad example and was only going to lead to trouble. The annoyed teenager was still highly annoyed with me, but he found it hard to argue with the request to be godly. The younger chose not to speak, because he realized their conversation was going in the wrong direction.
I do not always want to be godly. Sometimes I want to roll their heads. I love all of my children dearly. I realize that the physical boys and the strong willed girls have their own personalities, and with 6 children in the house, personalities are going to clash. As their parent, I can shut them down with my words and impart consequences, and sometimes I will go that route. But if I can, it is better to teach them to shut themselves down, question their own motives, and discern whether or not their thoughts and actions honor the Lord.
My children are children. They are imperfect. They are selfish. They are young sinners. Sadly, I am that way too. I am so far from where God wants me to be. But I am able to set an example for my children. I can teach them to relinquish their own will and do God's will. It is one thing to control your children's behavior. It is another to teach them to submit their thoughts and actions to God and lead disciplined lives. We should all ask God to:
My pre-teen is currently celebrating hitting puberty by dancing around the house because his skin is breaking out, his legs are getting hairy, and he's "becoming a man." Meanwhile, the new driver in the house is annoyed with me all the time and can't believe how stupid and unreasonable I am. But what is most interesting is when these two older boys clash. Most of the time they're content playing basketball together outside. But when they can't be physical with one another, their mouths begin to fly.
Yesterday the older and "wiser" teen instructed the younger preteen to shut up because he didn't know what he was talking about. Lucky for them, I was also in the room, and realized that neither knew what they were talking about. In that moment, I could have given them both a tongue lashing and put them in their place. Instead I asked this question, "Do your words honor God?"
I do not always want to be godly. Sometimes I want to roll their heads. I love all of my children dearly. I realize that the physical boys and the strong willed girls have their own personalities, and with 6 children in the house, personalities are going to clash. As their parent, I can shut them down with my words and impart consequences, and sometimes I will go that route. But if I can, it is better to teach them to shut themselves down, question their own motives, and discern whether or not their thoughts and actions honor the Lord.
My children are children. They are imperfect. They are selfish. They are young sinners. Sadly, I am that way too. I am so far from where God wants me to be. But I am able to set an example for my children. I can teach them to relinquish their own will and do God's will. It is one thing to control your children's behavior. It is another to teach them to submit their thoughts and actions to God and lead disciplined lives. We should all ask God to:
Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalms 139:23-24
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