Hallmark Christmas Movies
Let's be real. My husband is never going to star in a Hallmark Christmas movie. I think he's good looking, but he's not into Christmas, has never asked me to go to a gingerbread house building contest, and could care less about a Christmas tree lighting. When it snows, he doesn't gaze into my eyes and lean in for a kiss. Far from it. In fact, his first reaction is to put on snow gear and blow out the driveway!
We go on date nights approximately twice a year, but most often our time together is spent folding laundry after the kids go to bed. However, I have watched my fair share of Christmas Hallmark movies, and while they stir a certain emotion inside, their plot lines are a far cry from real life. I'm not sure what happens after the two main characters share a romantic kiss and the cameras fade away, but it probably isn't a magical marriage full of surprise, romance, and intimate longing.
The reality of marriage includes snoring, dirty clothes on the floor, mood swings, illogical thoughts and actions, busy schedules, hurt feelings, and all the messiness that is involved when two separate people attempt to build a unified home and marriage. No one in those Hallmark movies has a messy house, unruly children, or intrusive family members - just the opposite. You can be assured that someone has died in nearly every Hallmark movie, which apparently makes a great backdrop for a happy holiday.
So, while the entertainment industry knows how to tug at our heart strings, they are terrible teachers of truth. If I measured the quality of my marriage by comparing it to the Hallmark standard, we'd fail. As I said before, snow does not make my husband fall madly in love with me. It convinces him to clean the driveway. And think I prefer it that way.
I love that my husband loves his children, hugs them, disciplines them, and makes them laugh. Hallmark children behave perfectly - mine have special issues. I love that my husband doesn't complain about a messy house, but instead will sit in his chair and fold laundry for hours on end. There is no laundry in a Hallmark movie. I love that my husband sometimes snores at night, because it reminds me he is by my side even when I'm not fully awake. Who knows about the long term dependability of the Hallmark heartthrobs. I could sit here and pine over made up people in a made up world, or I can look at my husband and enumerate all the reasons he far surpasses a fleeting Hallmark star.
One day, he will die (probably before me if statistics have their say). And I will miss the snoring, folding the laundry with him, his battle against the snow, and his deep love for our children. I will miss his incessant teasing and his steadfast love for me. I could choose to focus on all the ways he misses the mark and I could measure him against the entertainment industry's standard, or I can choose to see my spouse the way God sees him.
The truth is, Hollywood is not for our marriages. The entertainment industry is not a great purveyor of truth. As I watch romantic movies, I sometimes wonder to myself why my husband isn't more like the main character. But that is a dangerous train of thought. It is wrong to expect life to mimic make-believe, and it is unrealistic to expect my husband to live in a fantasy land where he miraculously understands everything I'm thinking while he's simultaneously oblivious to reality. The Bible tells us in Exodus 20:17, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” That verse also applies to made up people in made up stories. Coveting is always dangerous. The devil will always try to tempt us into believing that what we have is not good enough. But God promises that He will meet all our needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19) That verse pertains to our spouse as well. The grass may look greener in Hollywood, but it is all a facade.
I don't watch Hallmark Christmas movies nearly as often as I used to. But when I do, I remind myself how blessed I am to have a husband with far more godly qualities than any character in a movie. I am exceedingly thankful that snow moves him to clear the driveway instead of lean in for a kiss. God has blessed me beyond what I deserve. I know this to be true, not because Hallmark moved me, but rather because the Word of God taught me.
The reality of marriage includes snoring, dirty clothes on the floor, mood swings, illogical thoughts and actions, busy schedules, hurt feelings, and all the messiness that is involved when two separate people attempt to build a unified home and marriage. No one in those Hallmark movies has a messy house, unruly children, or intrusive family members - just the opposite. You can be assured that someone has died in nearly every Hallmark movie, which apparently makes a great backdrop for a happy holiday.
So, while the entertainment industry knows how to tug at our heart strings, they are terrible teachers of truth. If I measured the quality of my marriage by comparing it to the Hallmark standard, we'd fail. As I said before, snow does not make my husband fall madly in love with me. It convinces him to clean the driveway. And think I prefer it that way.
I love that my husband loves his children, hugs them, disciplines them, and makes them laugh. Hallmark children behave perfectly - mine have special issues. I love that my husband doesn't complain about a messy house, but instead will sit in his chair and fold laundry for hours on end. There is no laundry in a Hallmark movie. I love that my husband sometimes snores at night, because it reminds me he is by my side even when I'm not fully awake. Who knows about the long term dependability of the Hallmark heartthrobs. I could sit here and pine over made up people in a made up world, or I can look at my husband and enumerate all the reasons he far surpasses a fleeting Hallmark star.
One day, he will die (probably before me if statistics have their say). And I will miss the snoring, folding the laundry with him, his battle against the snow, and his deep love for our children. I will miss his incessant teasing and his steadfast love for me. I could choose to focus on all the ways he misses the mark and I could measure him against the entertainment industry's standard, or I can choose to see my spouse the way God sees him.
The truth is, Hollywood is not for our marriages. The entertainment industry is not a great purveyor of truth. As I watch romantic movies, I sometimes wonder to myself why my husband isn't more like the main character. But that is a dangerous train of thought. It is wrong to expect life to mimic make-believe, and it is unrealistic to expect my husband to live in a fantasy land where he miraculously understands everything I'm thinking while he's simultaneously oblivious to reality. The Bible tells us in Exodus 20:17, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” That verse also applies to made up people in made up stories. Coveting is always dangerous. The devil will always try to tempt us into believing that what we have is not good enough. But God promises that He will meet all our needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19) That verse pertains to our spouse as well. The grass may look greener in Hollywood, but it is all a facade.
I don't watch Hallmark Christmas movies nearly as often as I used to. But when I do, I remind myself how blessed I am to have a husband with far more godly qualities than any character in a movie. I am exceedingly thankful that snow moves him to clear the driveway instead of lean in for a kiss. God has blessed me beyond what I deserve. I know this to be true, not because Hallmark moved me, but rather because the Word of God taught me.
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